About
⚔️ TESTO HUNKIE ⚔️
Knights Kingdom
For one night only, we're transforming South East London into a medieval kingdom of glorious excess.
Think noble knights, wandering squires, overflowing goblets, impossible quests, tournament champions, and enough testosterone to bring down a castle!
Mother Lori Mae invites you to the Kingdom of Testosterone.
💌 COME DRESSED FOR THE REALM YOU DESERVE
Knight in shining armour. Lovesick prince. Rogue mercenary. Court fool. Blacksmith. Tavern regular. Castle servant. Renaissance heartthrob. Robin Hood-adjacent outlaw.
Sexy Chainmail, velvet, boots, crowns, capes, tiny tunics, dramatic sleeves.
⚔️ ARM WRESTLING RETURNS
A contest worthy of the royal court.
Challenge a worthy opponent.
Defend your honour.
Claim glory, admiration, and bragging rights across the realm.
🎧 SOUNDTRACK
HARIETTA will soundtrack the royal feast with euphoric and dancefloor anthems fit for the grand hall.
🏰 WHAT'S HAPPENING
🥧 Pies & tavern gossip: 8pm–10pm
⚔️ Arm wrestling tournament: 9:30pm
🕺 Royal ball: 11pm–1am
🚪 Doors: 7:30pm
📍 The Piehouse, SE8
💋 WHO IT'S FOR
Testo Hunkie is for trans masc folks and the gorgeous allies who love us loudly.
We centre trans masculinities while welcoming everyone who respects the space and comes ready to celebrate with us.
🎟️ ACCESS
– 18+ LGBTQ+ event
– Limited free tickets available for Dolls
– If money is a barrier, DM us — no one turned away for lack of funds.
🦽 ACCESSIBILITY
– Wheelchair accessible (ground floor)
– Accessible toilet next to the bar
– Seating available throughout
– Loud music, low lighting, bright/flickering lights
– Dogs welcome 🐶
😷 HEALTH
COVID is still around, babes — test if you can, and stay home if you're feeling rough.
✨ ABOUT TESTO HUNKIE
A DIY trans-masc love project from a bunch of SE London queers, building nights for flirtation, friendship, softness, glorious silliness, sweat, devotion, emotional chaos, and collective joy.
Raise your goblet.
Fight with honour.
Dance until the feast is over.
Because for one night only...
⚔️🍷👑
